Why Do Generations Clash? A Conversation With Social Psychologist and Author Dr. Jean Twenge

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For most of history, the realm of culture changed very slowly. The memes we shared – not cute social media gifs, but the “units of cultural transmission” – remained mostly fixed within a person’s lifetime. They formed a common set of references and values between the generations, ensuring continuity between the past, present, and future.

For better and worse, modern life has reversed this, probably forever. Fads and fashions pop up and consume one another almost daily, and technology keeps remaking work and life in unpredictable ways.

As a result, every new generation grows up with a unique set of cultural references that hits their developmental life cycle in a particular way. Generational differences become more than superficial. They’re not just about the way we dress or the music we listen to. In many ways, they point to different ways of looking at the world.

This may be one of the reasons our society’s starting to feel like a Tower of Babel: the more we talk, the less we seem to actually understand one another.

We colloquially talk about the five or so generations that currently compose Western society using broadly available stereotypes: Boomers are more self-absorbed than their dutiful, Silent generation parents. Millennials are entitled and thin-skinned, especially compared to their cynical Gen X older siblings. Gen Z is mindlessly wasting away on screens, and expects others to fix everything. The Silent Generation is … well, silent. As in invisible.

Are these opinions even true? If so, to what degree? And can they mask deeper realities and trends even as they illuminate the obvious?

My guest in this episode of the podcast, social psychologist Dr. Jean Twenge (

Generation Tech

), has taken the analysis of generations to a completely different level.

Her latest book, Generations, draws from 24 national datasets, includes data from 39 million people, and uses almost 200 charts to track how the generations differ in matters like life goals, education, political views, sexual attitudes, income, and social values. She carefully explores the causal pathways between the data and available explanations, offering a rich set of insights about the actual differences – and similarities – between the generations.

Our clichés about the generations often carry a kernel of truth, but never tell the whole story:

Boomers are genuine idealists and were the driving force behind much of the social progress we take for granted today.

Millennials are far more hard-working and successful than the earlier views on them suggested, but growing up with so much social comparison has also amped up their mental health issues.

Gen X is secretly quite materialistic, and still dreams of political relevance - in many ways, they’re embodying the things they’ve always been cynical about.

Gen Z are still figuring things out, and are already showing signs of advanced social engagement.

And maybe most surprising are the things we can learn from the Silent generation, who’ve had way better mental health and stronger families than all the generations after them, but who we still fail to seek wisdom from.

In the interview, Dr. Twenge suggests we should “start with understanding that someone might have a different perspective because of when they were born. Great place to start.”

From there, the complexity and depth she uncovers in each generation should be taken as an invitation to listen to each other more deeply outside of social media circles – whether in person or even using high-quality survey evidence:

“When you're on social media, it feels like you're getting a cross section of what people think and you're not – you're getting often the angriest and the most negative. And then it's also, the people who have particular grievances who are going to spend the most time. You're not really getting a cross section on what people think. And it's tempting to believe that, but you're not. So, trying to have those conversations in person as much as possible is certainly one way to go.

We also spend some time discussing how current trends like technology and individualism are contributing to today’s mental health crisis, and the hidden opportunities that come from understanding other generations better.

Her insights are especially valuable to anyone who’s building teams or communities, as better group dynamics often requires better understanding people from different generations.

You can start with this short clip on the risks of separating self-esteem from merit and competence.